"Fun" Ways of Saying the Subject Sucks

[Metamorphic]

I just dished this one. "IT WAS NOT POSSIBLE TO BRACKET THE SUBJECT ON CONDITION; NO COMPARABLE PROPERTIES IN THE MARKET AREA OF RECENT SALE OR CURRENT LISTING WERE FOUND THAT WERE IN SIMILAR OR POORER CONDITION. "

Thought you'all might have some similar cherished one-liners.

 

[aussie ken]

I just dished this one. "IT WAS NOT POSSIBLE TO BRACKET THE SUBJECT ON CONDITION; NO COMPARABLE PROPERTIES IN THE MARKET AREA OF RECENT SALE OR CURRENT LISTING WERE FOUND THAT WERE IN SIMILAR OR POORER CONDITION. "

Thought you'all might have some similar cherished one-liners.

Subject property is of very tired presentation OR...................the subject property is shabby OR................the subject property is well below the local average street appeal AND...............all immediate area sales examined were of similar locale but of noticeably superior street appeal.

 

[Mike Garrett RAA]

A picture is worth a thousand words!

 

[Tom Woolford]

For a neighborhood of shacks, crap lying all over the place and pigs roaming free:

"Neighborhood appears to tolerate unpermitted construction as well as private salvage operations, and free range animal husbandry".

 

[Wendy]

For a neighborhood of shacks, crap lying all over the place and pigs roaming free:

"Neighborhood appears to tolerate unpermitted construction as well as private salvage operations, and free range animal husbandry".

 

[The Warrior Monk]

We just say the house needs a careless smoker.

 

[c w d]

We just say the house needs a careless smoker.

Is that "subject to" or "as is"? :new_smile-l:

 

[The Warrior Monk]

Is that "subject to" or "as is"? :new_smile-l:

"As Is," Interim Use.

 

[Michigan CG]

The subject property is suffering from severe neglect and deferred maintenance as can be seen in the enclosed photographs. It is unclear whether or not the deferred maintenance is curable when considering financial feasibility.

or one could be very blunt and say:

The property has a bulldozer problem, the problem being no bulldozer has shown up yet.

 

[Mountain Man]

We just say the house needs a careless smoker.

I like that. We call them D9'ers here... as in needing a Caterpillar D9 to "remedy" the highest and best use problem.