Stories About Nightmare Properties Or Funny Inspections

[bnmappraisal]

i had a townhouse appraisal once where my 3rd comp was OUTSIDE the subjects subdivision

Now THAT's got HORROR FLICK written all over it You must've cried yourself to sleep that night Digger

 

[Deleted member 128537]

I did a house in NW Wisconsin. The owner was nicknamed the “wolf lady.” When I drove up to the house she literally had about a dozen wolves chained up outside their “wolf” houses. But one wolf was beside her. It had to weigh close to 150lbs and dark black. Needless to say that was a fast inspection.

 

[EddieB]

Last month I did a walk through of a long closed 1960’s senior living facility. Over 60,000 sf ft, boarded windows, no power.

There were five of us with flashlights and I couldn’t wait to get back outside.

 

[Tom Woolford]

Some years ago I had an appointment at a home in a pretty nice equestrian community of medium acreage. I get to the house and introduced myself, gave him a card etc. The guy was about jumping out of his skin a needed a Valium more than any other person I'd ever seen. I started measuring the house, and through the windows I could see mannequins posed in every room: sitting in chairs, lying in beds or on the floor etc. When I was ready to go inside the guy freaked and was making all kinds of excuses for why I couldn't go inside. I got him calmed down, and we went inside. I was completing the sketch and making notes and he was calming down pretty well. When I took out the camera is when the wheels came off the wagon. He ordered me out of the house, tried to take my camera and iPad and said he was going to shoot me (I was carrying too), I got out of there told him to contact his lender and hauled azz.

The next morning I had an email from him even crazier than the behavior he displayed while I was at the house. I replied to him and told him I had declined the assignment and to contact his lender. But if he tried to keep getting a loan, the next Appraiser (hopefully) would take the same notes, measurements and pictures I did. Told him never to contact me again. He had to be the weirdest (and scary) m****er I've come across in all these years. Today, I probably wouldn't mess with it past the first altercation.

 

[Marty Boone]

I did a walk through for a two unit last week in Carlisle, PA. I rang the bell, knocked on the door and announced myself when entering the first floor unit. No issues walked the property and did my thing, got to the last room and opened the door and saw a woman sleeping with her eyes open. BTW, I went to see Killer Queen a few weeks ago in York, PA. Best tribute band I have ever seen, those guys nailed it.

 

[Maria Mercury]

I did a walk through for a two unit last week in Carlisle, PA. I rang the bell, knocked on the door and announced myself when entering the first floor unit. No issues walked the property and did my thing, got to the last room and opened the door and saw a woman sleeping with her eyes open. BTW, I went to see Killer Queen a few weeks ago in York, PA. Best tribute band I have ever seen, those guys nailed it.

Awesome! Long live Freddie!

 

[KYLECODY]

Set up an appt for a standard refi, the guy wanted to meet me at Dennys first to drink coffee and discuss the house? After politely telling him he was crazy he said he just wanted to kill time until his girlfriend left the house. Supposedly she stated a realtor that was in the house weeks before stole some expensive jewelry and his "lady" went loopy about it. We set the time for a bit later. I show up in front of this giant estate and a 70 yr old guy with his arms flailing comes running up to my car, in the street not driveway, saying his woman attacked and scratched him and is crazy..He had blood on his arms, minor, and wanted to use my phone to call 911..out running behind him comes this beautiful girl in her late 20s yelling and screaming at him and telling me I cant come in the house...he calls 911...meanwhile smart appraiser, me, just shakes my head at the idiots, rolls up my window, waits for the police and never leaves the car.

Girlfriend drives away quickly, police show up, old guy tells his story, blah blah. I ask the officer if he will walk through the home with me to make sure no one else gets accused of stealing stuff..He is cool as can be and hangs with me for 45 minutes, wrote his name down..They had security cameras in a room filled with nothing but womens shoes...Must of been her magic, shoe room. Fast forward two weeks, Mesa, AZ police detective calls me stating so and so said someone had stolen very expensive jewelry and items from the home...I tell her the story, how they told me a realtor had done that previously and gave my comedic musings on the pitfalls of "old men" dating "little girls", find the file and say do you know officer so and so? He was with me the entire time..Phew.

Fast forward three more weeks. Another phone call, from their insurance company this time. They state someone stole a "collection" of jewelry valued at $125k..I say, thinking its funny at this point, "oh yeah I talked to the police on this, they said a realtor had stolen a bunch of stuff a few weeks before I got there". Insurance agent/investigator says "We were told it was you that did that".... Not funny anymore..sucked the p*** right out of me. Told them to call the police as this had been covered and I had nothing else to say..

Looking back I'm 70% sure the whole charade was a setup by the owner and his little toy trying to do some insurance scam, Im also about 99% sure the insurance person was just fishing seeing what I would say.. Lessons learned: 1)Always have the police with you or refuse any assignment where crazy or previous accusations are mentioned. 2) Crazy, young girls can be a lot of fun when you're in an appropriate age range and then for a very short time period until you learn that lesson...once they're young enough to be your daughter or granddaughter all you can look forward to is arm scratches, embarrassment, drama and the humiliation of a random policeman and cynical appraiser knowing you were stupid enough to let a scheming young lady move into your fancy house and devote a full room just to her shoes and you actually agreed to set up cameras to "watch" the shoes...) Just shoot me, really, just shoot me if I ever did that.

 

[ramrcdk]

Nice lady came to the door, I said I will measure outside & knock back momentarily. Rear yard sloped severely, as I back stepped. I had looked behind me several times ...why were the dead leaves making so much noise. Down & down I went to get that ...rear view photo.
The lady came out on her deck, from below I could see her head & tips of her shoes. She was standing there laughing and laughing, just laughing. My thoughts, I dread going inside, what is she on. She was saying something, seemed like a long time, & through the laughter she says & my brain hears "my husband never goes in that back yard... due to all the snakes".
My camera went left, my clip board, pencil, measuring tape, etc joined the layers of leaves. In less time than any race I never won, my shoes found as many holes as I never wanted to see.
Eventually, the nice lady found my camera & tape.


A request for appraisal, no data available for the subject except tax. Rep indicated a rush as two other appraisers had declined the order. Declined the order? Why? Doesn't appear to be anything but easy. Upon inspection, I opened the door to find a white substance covering most of the living room & a horrific smell.
Upon exiting, saw a bit of crime tape hanging out of the trash can. White substance was borax, the investigation had just concluded, & the body had been found FEW too many days prior my arrival. EA & HC : that was a lengthy report.

 

[EddieB]

I got to a house around 7:30 am and the wife let me in. Strong smell of pot and a bong on the table. She acted like it was no big deal so neither did I. Went to the lower level den and two teenagers were going at it like rabbits. They both looked at me and kept on.

All of them were having a better morning than I was...

 

[KYLECODY]

I got to a house around 7:30 am and the wife let me in. Strong smell of pot and a bong on the table. She acted like it was no big deal so neither did I. Went to the lower level den and two teenagers were going at it like rabbits. They both looked at me and kept on.

All of them were having a better morning than I was...

Aww those N Carolina people...were the teenagers related? Jk.